Gay Marriage, Immigration, and Assimilation

The current argument over whether legalizing gay marriage will "weaken" heterosexual marriages bears some striking similarities to the immigration debate. Opponents of immigration fear that American culture and identity will be compromised by the influx of foreigners. They fear that immigrants will refuse or fail to assimilate, that they will isolate themselves and create ethnic conclaves in which crime is rampant and birth rates are off the charts. In making their case, conservatives point to Mexican radicals who want to take back Texas and California and imply that this might be a broadly-shared immigrant agenda. (Opponents of gay marriage do the same in pointing to radical homosexual activists who want to create a "post-marriage society.")

The data on immigrants do not support these conclusions. At present, studies seem for the most part to show that assimilation in the United States still works. All the identity politics our universities can muster have not stopped Asians, Mexicans, or Russians from becoming full-fledged Americans by the third generation. Minorities, meanwhile, are impacting the broader culture but only in subtle ways; they have not by any means knocked our core American values off their foundations.

There is one exception. The black community, which jealously guards its identity as an oppressed community, has resisted assimilation and upward mobility to an extent that no other minority group has done. And since racism against blacks does continue in some circles, the amelioration of this situation is likely to be long in the making. Meanwhile, one could certainly argue that troubled black youths have affected the broader society in negative ways.

And so the question of the day is whether gay marriage "infect" the broader society with its open relationships, or whether gays will assimilate to the monogamous ethics that are more typical of the broader society. It is probable that hatred of gays will continue for the near-to-indefinite future, and that they will continue to guard their persecuted identity as blacks have done. Thus if assimilation occurs, it may be a slow process. On the other hand, gays are a sufficiently small minority that their ability to make the kinds of cultural waves required to change the society's values is doubtful. Moreover, the gays are here to stay, regardless of whether or not they are permitted to marry. As long as they remain targets of legal discrimination (or even can credibly define themselves as such), we are actually more likely to have gay Teletubbies and TV shows like "The L Word" than if we let them live in peace. And assimilation will never occur if we are afraid to give it a chance. Under such circumstances, I'd say it seems advisable for defenders of traditional marriage to give legalization a try, wouldn't you?